109. The Middle Ground: Options for Moms Considering Leaving Their Jobs
Many moms feel caught between staying in a corporate job and pursuing something new. You’ve worked hard, built success, and created financial security, but part of you wonders whether there’s another path that aligns better with your values, goals, and lifestyle. The pressure to make the perfect move or wait for the ideal moment can leave you feeling stuck and uncertain.
In this episode, I explore the middle ground and all the other options out there for moms considering leaving their nine-to-fives. I talk about ways to navigate this transition intentionally, without making rash decisions or feeling like you have to go all in immediately. You’ll hear strategies for exploring alternatives, testing ideas, and creating a safe path forward while maintaining stability for yourself and your family.
If you’ve been thinking about a career change but aren’t sure how to approach it, this conversation will help you see that there are options beyond the all-or-nothing mindset. You’ll learn how small, deliberate steps can create momentum, build confidence, and allow you to make decisions from clarity instead of fear. By exploring the middle ground, you can take meaningful action toward the career and life you want while protecting what matters most.
Ready for clarity and a simple action plan to get your business started? Schedule a free 1-hour consultation with me here!
What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
Why the all-or-nothing mindset can keep moms stuck in corporate roles.
How to identify options that align with your goals without taking unnecessary risks.
Ways to test new ideas while maintaining financial and family stability.
How to create clarity and make decisions from a place of thoughtfulness rather than fear.
Practical strategies to approach a career transition thoughtfully and safely.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
Click here for step-by-step instructions to leave a rating and review to let me know what you think, and don’t forget to share the podcast with others who you think would benefit!
If you're looking for the right environment to start your networking journey, look no further than my group, the Mom Entrepreneur’s Circle. Sign up here for mutual support, advice sharing, and the tools you need for both you and your business to thrive.
Episodes Related to The Middle Ground for Moms:
91. Building a Business Without Quitting Your Job (For Moms Who Want Financial Security)
108. Leaving Your Job Intentionally Without Sacrificing Security with Tania Brown
Full Episode Transcript:
Have you ever found yourself thinking, I either need to quit my job immediately or stay miserable forever?
Trust me, I've been there too. This is known as all-or-nothing thinking in my world, and if you've ever thought that, or maybe if you're desperately thinking that right now, this episode is for you. Because quitting your job or staying miserable are never your only two options.
Today we're going to talk about all the other options you may not be thinking about that really could give you immediate relief.
Welcome to How to Quit Your Job, the podcast for moms ready to ditch the nine-to-five and build a life and business they love. I’m your host, Jenna Rykiel. Let’s go.
Hi, mom friends. I have a free webinar coming up, and it's a conversation I've had before that's been really great for moms who want to leave their nine-to-five to start a business. It's about doing it without taking on financial risk. And today's conversation is going to be a glimpse into what the opposite of all-or-nothing thinking looks like in this case.
So often, moms come to me ready to burn it all down. They want to leave their corporate role immediately and never look back. But they are also terrified of losing a steady paycheck. They are afraid to lose their benefits. They are worried that their business won't work out and it will negatively impact their family. And what I see every time is that with a little shift out of all-or-nothing thinking, options open up. Opportunities open up. Paths become clear that weren't before of ways that they can reach their goals without taking on more risk than they feel comfortable with.
So today we're going to talk about why we get into that all-or-nothing thinking when it comes to starting a business and leaving our jobs. I want to talk about the infinite middle ground of options where thousands of other options exist. And I want to talk about some real examples that I've seen with clients that may also apply to your life. Because here's the thing. There's probably a really good reason that you want change. But we rarely think strategically when we're feeling big emotions about the situation.
By that I mean, if you're devastated because you just came back from maternity leave and no one at work understands you, that you're not able to focus because your boobs are exploding and you just miss your baby. If you're feeling underappreciated because raises were just given and you didn't get one, and you're pretty sure it's because you've had to take more time off because the kids are sick this year and you had to do a bunch of childcare. If you're angry and frustrated because your organization just went through a reorg and now you have more work, a demoted title, and a number of your favorite coworkers were laid off.
If any flavor of those things are happening, emotions are going to be high. It can be really easy to think that the only way is to escape immediately. We think that once we get out of this environment, we'll figure it out. Our brain wants to jump ship because we are swimming in and thinking about everything that's going wrong. It's in our face every moment of every day, 40-plus hours a week.
Every email from your boss sends your body into an intense rage response. Every meeting feels pointless and like we're wasting time that we could be with our kids. It's normal for your brain to want to highlight and focus on everything going wrong, and it's normal for it to jump to the extreme solution to burn it all down and leave, escape immediately, and never look back. To leave the job and dip into savings and trust that you can figure it out.
But at the same time, like I said, there's a real part of your brain that's afraid of that option too. Questioning whether or not it's going to work out. How will I make money? There's no stability in entrepreneurship, your brain might say. These are the two options your brain gives you: stay and be miserable or leave and put your family at financial risk. That's all-or-nothing thinking. One extreme or the other. And when we're thinking like this, normally neither of those options actually feels great.
And this happens because when emotions are high, intelligence is low. What that means is that we aren't able to see the forest through the trees, the big picture, the strategy when we're constantly in a state of fight or flight. When we're in a state of frustration, resentment, disappointment, we're not our best problem solvers.
We are the best problem solvers, meaning we come up with the best solutions when we are emotionally stable. Better yet, when we're feeling energized and excited and hopeful and purposeful or any flavor of emotion that has our body feeling light and energized, that's an even better headspace for solutions. But if you are desperate for change, I can imagine that these emotions are not easy to come by.
Per usual, I want to say that it's normal if your brain is doing this. That's normal. But I also want this conversation to open up a door to more ideas and possibilities. So let's dig into some of those possibilities. What you can do if work is not working for you anymore. But maybe you need the steady paycheck and the benefits. We're going to talk about what exists between those two extremes, the extremes of quit or be miserable.
I want you to walk away today with a different way of thinking about your situation, one that gives you more flexibility, more possibility, and often a lot less risk. And if you are not in a scenario, so maybe you already started your business and you are chipping away at it, I still want you to listen and really soak in this episode because all-or-nothing thinking shows up in so many other ways as well. We think in extremes. So listen, hear the insights, see how you can apply it to your current situation.
For those who are contemplating leaving their nine-to-five, I want to reiterate something I've said before, that the goal isn't to quit immediately. I know I have a podcast called How to Quit Your Job. Sometimes the goal is to create enough space, energy, and stability so that you can build what comes next. This new business, this opportunity from a place of abundance instead of lack and panic. And sometimes, I will say often times, that means staying in a nine-to-five with a steady paycheck at least for a little longer than you might want to.
So let's talk about all the in-between options. I started working with a client the other day that was 100% sure that she wanted to leave her job. She wanted to spend more time with her kid who's going to be in kindergarten next year. Her and her family were okay with dipping into their savings while she did that. But the hesitation for her was that she had worked so hard to build her career and felt like she was throwing it all away. She has always longed to live outside the nine-to-five structure, has always wanted more freedom and to be able to do what she wants with her time.
But there's also a part of her that feels really proud of the career she built. Her company's pretty flexible, and she's over a year into her leadership role where she's finally feeling like she knows the players, she feels valuable, and honestly, the work does not feel stressful or like a lot of work in her situation.
I was curious what wasn't working for her because it sounded like the job itself wasn't so much the problem. Her goal was to see her son more. This was led by this thought and feeling that with him going to kindergarten next year, she won't have as much time with him. So I asked her directly, "Okay, what does more time with your kid mean?" And she said, "I'd like to go on bike trips. I'd like to do more fun things throughout the week." I asked her to make a list of the things she wanted to do with her son.
And actually, through this process, she realized that although she wanted to spend more time with her kid, she didn't want to be home 100% of the time with him. She knew that this would not be great for the relationship. She also needed her own space. But when she made the list, honestly, it wasn't all that extensive. So I asked, "How could you easily do these things and stay at your job? How could you have your cake and eat it too?"
Then she told me that her job actually has unlimited PTO, but she doesn't take as much because then her boss would have to cover for her, and she'd feel guilty about that. And I absolutely loved learning this piece about her and her company. I work with so many people and have experienced the luxury but also the mental drama around PTO. In this case, she didn't want to take PTO because she didn't want her boss to cover for her, but instead, she wanted to leave her job entirely, which would actually mean, guess what? That her boss would be covering for her even more. So what she felt guilty about with the PTO, it's interesting that it wasn't a part of the conversation for actually leaving the company.
But this was also an opportunity to talk about an option that she hadn't thought about. Can you take more PTO and build in intentional time with your kids or your family that energizes you and lights you up? I'd ask that for all listeners who are in a corporate role and who are feeling drained. Is it possible for you to take more time off? I told her, "Before leaving your job, let's experiment with actually taking the PTO you are given and work on not feeling guilty." I know there's a lot of unspoken rules around unlimited PTO. I lived it. But listen, if you were already on your way of voluntarily saying goodbye, the worst thing that could happen is that your company fires you for taking too much of the unlimited PTO that they said you could have.
So she mapped out using PTO not just those bike trips that we talked about, but also for time during the week for herself and her family. I used to love taking off a random Wednesday in the week that was just for me. It was a beautiful midweek day where nothing's busy, and then I could catch up on emails the next day, which always felt like I could still go into the weekend without a lot of weight on my shoulders.
For her, another really exciting thing that popped up from this conversation is that her company has summer Fridays, where little work is expected on Friday. I don't know if it's official or unofficial, but she could essentially take those days off. So we talked through her spending one Friday each month on a little day date with her partner, one Friday each month as a personal day for herself, and two Fridays each month doing something fun with her kid. These options had her lit up and excited.
We're of course going to see how it all unfolds and listen, I wouldn't be surprised if she still ended up leaving her job. But here is a plan that allows us to see if there's a way for her to have the best of both worlds: a corporate role she feels proud of and more time with her kiddo.
Another thing that we explored, and that I've explored with plenty of moms, is the possibility of cutting hours. Yes, this usually cuts pay, but it's an option in the middle, right? Outside of the two extremes. Is there a specific schedule or hours that can shift that feels like a happy medium? Maybe dropping from 40 hours to 30, and that would give you Fridays to yourself or 10 hours a week to work on your business.
I just met a mom friend in my neighborhood who dropped down to 30 hours after her first son was born and just kept that schedule, and even now has Fridays off and that's her day to herself, which I just love. Maybe you want to work three days a week and you figure out what that looks like. Maybe you're in a role where you can completely work in the evenings, so it allows you to get to pick up on time, to do drop off, the kids don't have to go to extended care after school. Whatever the schedule, it may not be out of the realm of possibility. We'll never know if we don't explore it and if we don't ask.
I have another neighbor mom friend who recently returned to work after maternity leave, and it's been a struggle for her, as we all can attest to, that struggle. She's also been a bit frustrated with things that did and didn't happen while she was gone, so she's feeling like she came back to a bit of a mess. And on top of that, her husband's paternity leave is better than her company's maternity leave. His allows parents to ease back into work starting with a part-time schedule if they'd like.
And this glimpse into the possibility at another company gave her courage to test it out with her own. So she decided to start ending her day early and going home for the last hour of her workday. Now, this may not sound revolutionary and it's not, but to her, it was incredibly bold. And when she told her boss what she was doing, he completely supported it.
So many of the things that would give us energy about our schedules and about our work feel bold to us, but it might not be as bold as you think. She could tell that her company was just so happy to have her back and really didn't want her to leave her company. So she's learned that she actually can even ask for more. It sort of dawned on her as an aha moment. I could just ask for this. And then that's my question for this and for every mom, which is what else are we not asking for that could help us feel better at work?
Time and time again, I talk to and coach moms and see an underlying theme of not asking for what we need in the workplace. I would also go as far as to say we're not asking for what we need in our partnerships. And oftentimes, I think we know the answer from our partner will be a yes. But with our organizations, yes, some organizations just suck and some bosses just suck. But also in so many situations and scenarios, we aren't asking. We're just assuming the answer will be no.
We aren't even really asking ourselves what success looks like or what would make our work feel better. We're just jumping to the conclusion that since this doesn't feel good right now, the grass is greener on the other side. And all of these schedule requests that we could explore, since we don't see anyone else doing the thing we want to do, we usually don't ask. The thing that would help us ease back into work or keep us from feeling like we need to leave all together.
I don't care if the request is completely absurd. I want you to just ask. I had a coach one time who talked about asking for absurd things. Like this is just the way she lived her life. She asked for absurd things because she wanted to get really good at hearing no. And I just love that. Practicing hearing no in the real world, getting just really good at hearing no and asking for absurd things.
I want you to have a hard conversation with your employer, with your partner, where you're asking for what you need so that maybe you don't have to leave, or you don't have to leave just yet. Because I said before, though this podcast is called How to Quit Your Job, I'm never rushing clients out of their job. In fact, I'm usually finding ways that they could stay longer so that they have financial stability while they build. That's the best way to build a business from financial abundance.
The goal here is not necessarily to make ourselves stay in an environment where we're miserable long term. Our goal is to change our environment to make it more enjoyable by asking for a different schedule, taking more time off, dropping hours, asking to be on a different team with a different boss or in a different role altogether. Try out some of these options first so that you start a business while maintaining financial security.
That's the other thing I want to mention here. I'm definitely not suggesting that any one change is going to completely change everything. Even changing teams, bosses, hours, taking more time off, all combined, likely will not scratch the itch for you if you've been wanting to build something of your own or want true freedom in your time and days. That's okay. This isn't a forever fix. This is just literally buying you time while you are getting your business off the ground. But even while you're doing that, we want to feel better. So ask. Think of the best-case scenarios at work and ask for it. The worst that can happen is that they say no.
And ultimately, that's what I want you to take away from today's conversation. When we're stuck in all-or-nothing thinking, we miss opportunities that are right in front of us. The client I talked about earlier, after we had this conversation, she was, "Jenna, you're so smart." And I said, "No, I just don't have as much mental drama as you on this particular topic." We convince ourselves that our only options are to stay miserable or make a massive leap into uncertainty. But most of the time, all of the time, there are tons of possibilities in between.
So whether it's taking more PTO, reducing your hours, asking for a different schedule, changing teams, I want you to explore starting your business while keeping the paycheck and benefits that help your family feel secure. The goal isn't to stay somewhere forever that's no longer aligned. The goal is to make decisions from a place of clarity instead of desperation. And all-or-nothing thinking can put us into a space of desperation.
If this is something that you're navigating, I definitely want you to come to my free upcoming training where we'll go even deeper into this conversation. It's called How to Start a Business Without Financial Risk. If you're catching this live, that is on June 26th. So definitely be there. If you are not catching this live, what you need to do is go and subscribe or follow the podcast. That way, whenever new trainings and webinars and free resources come out, you will be one of the first to know about them because I'm always talking about them on the podcast.
In that training, we're going to talk about how to keep your job. We're going to talk about how to add a business into an already full life of a nine-to-five. We're going to talk about how to create a plan that feels exciting without putting unnecessary pressure on you or your family. We're going to talk about a lot of really fun things. So I hope you're catching this live, and if you're not, and if you missed it, please follow the podcast so you don't miss the next one. I try and do a training or webinar at least every month so that people can come in and learn from me, ask questions, get individualized support. It's been super fun.
You can learn more about what's going on and links to upcoming trainings and webinars at jenna.coach/109. You can also sign up for the Mom Entrepreneur’s Circle that I host and sign up for my email list so you never miss an episode and never miss any great resource that's coming out. Lots of ways for you to be supported, lots of ways for you to keep moving forward. And remember, there are more than just those two options.
Thank you so much for being here, supporting yourself through the podcast. I love being a voice in your ear to cheer you on and hope that you keep going. I'll see you next week.
Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of How to Quit Your Job: A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Life and Business You Love. If you want to learn more about how I can help you stop making excuses and start making moves, head on over to www.jenna.coach. I’ll see you next week.
Trust me, I've been there too. This is known as all-or-nothing thinking in my world, and if you've ever thought that, or maybe if you're desperately thinking that right now, this episode is for you. Because quitting your job or staying miserable are never your only two options.
Today we're going to talk about all the other options you may not be thinking about that really could give you immediate relief.
Welcome to How to Quit Your Job, the podcast for moms ready to ditch the nine-to-five and build a life and business they love. I’m your host, Jenna Rykiel. Let’s go.
Hi, mom friends. I have a free webinar coming up, and it's a conversation I've had before that's been really great for moms who want to leave their nine-to-five to start a business. It's about doing it without taking on financial risk. And today's conversation is going to be a glimpse into what the opposite of all-or-nothing thinking looks like in this case.
So often, moms come to me ready to burn it all down. They want to leave their corporate role immediately and never look back. But they are also terrified of losing a steady paycheck. They are afraid to lose their benefits. They are worried that their business won't work out and it will negatively impact their family. And what I see every time is that with a little shift out of all-or-nothing thinking, options open up. Opportunities open up. Paths become clear that weren't before of ways that they can reach their goals without taking on more risk than they feel comfortable with.
So today we're going to talk about why we get into that all-or-nothing thinking when it comes to starting a business and leaving our jobs. I want to talk about the infinite middle ground of options where thousands of other options exist. And I want to talk about some real examples that I've seen with clients that may also apply to your life. Because here's the thing. There's probably a really good reason that you want change. But we rarely think strategically when we're feeling big emotions about the situation.
By that I mean, if you're devastated because you just came back from maternity leave and no one at work understands you, that you're not able to focus because your boobs are exploding and you just miss your baby. If you're feeling underappreciated because raises were just given and you didn't get one, and you're pretty sure it's because you've had to take more time off because the kids are sick this year and you had to do a bunch of childcare. If you're angry and frustrated because your organization just went through a reorg and now you have more work, a demoted title, and a number of your favorite coworkers were laid off.
If any flavor of those things are happening, emotions are going to be high. It can be really easy to think that the only way is to escape immediately. We think that once we get out of this environment, we'll figure it out. Our brain wants to jump ship because we are swimming in and thinking about everything that's going wrong. It's in our face every moment of every day, 40-plus hours a week.
Every email from your boss sends your body into an intense rage response. Every meeting feels pointless and like we're wasting time that we could be with our kids. It's normal for your brain to want to highlight and focus on everything going wrong, and it's normal for it to jump to the extreme solution to burn it all down and leave, escape immediately, and never look back. To leave the job and dip into savings and trust that you can figure it out.
But at the same time, like I said, there's a real part of your brain that's afraid of that option too. Questioning whether or not it's going to work out. How will I make money? There's no stability in entrepreneurship, your brain might say. These are the two options your brain gives you: stay and be miserable or leave and put your family at financial risk. That's all-or-nothing thinking. One extreme or the other. And when we're thinking like this, normally neither of those options actually feels great.
And this happens because when emotions are high, intelligence is low. What that means is that we aren't able to see the forest through the trees, the big picture, the strategy when we're constantly in a state of fight or flight. When we're in a state of frustration, resentment, disappointment, we're not our best problem solvers.
We are the best problem solvers, meaning we come up with the best solutions when we are emotionally stable. Better yet, when we're feeling energized and excited and hopeful and purposeful or any flavor of emotion that has our body feeling light and energized, that's an even better headspace for solutions. But if you are desperate for change, I can imagine that these emotions are not easy to come by.
Per usual, I want to say that it's normal if your brain is doing this. That's normal. But I also want this conversation to open up a door to more ideas and possibilities. So let's dig into some of those possibilities. What you can do if work is not working for you anymore. But maybe you need the steady paycheck and the benefits. We're going to talk about what exists between those two extremes, the extremes of quit or be miserable.
I want you to walk away today with a different way of thinking about your situation, one that gives you more flexibility, more possibility, and often a lot less risk. And if you are not in a scenario, so maybe you already started your business and you are chipping away at it, I still want you to listen and really soak in this episode because all-or-nothing thinking shows up in so many other ways as well. We think in extremes. So listen, hear the insights, see how you can apply it to your current situation.
For those who are contemplating leaving their nine-to-five, I want to reiterate something I've said before, that the goal isn't to quit immediately. I know I have a podcast called How to Quit Your Job. Sometimes the goal is to create enough space, energy, and stability so that you can build what comes next. This new business, this opportunity from a place of abundance instead of lack and panic. And sometimes, I will say often times, that means staying in a nine-to-five with a steady paycheck at least for a little longer than you might want to.
So let's talk about all the in-between options. I started working with a client the other day that was 100% sure that she wanted to leave her job. She wanted to spend more time with her kid who's going to be in kindergarten next year. Her and her family were okay with dipping into their savings while she did that. But the hesitation for her was that she had worked so hard to build her career and felt like she was throwing it all away. She has always longed to live outside the nine-to-five structure, has always wanted more freedom and to be able to do what she wants with her time.
But there's also a part of her that feels really proud of the career she built. Her company's pretty flexible, and she's over a year into her leadership role where she's finally feeling like she knows the players, she feels valuable, and honestly, the work does not feel stressful or like a lot of work in her situation.
I was curious what wasn't working for her because it sounded like the job itself wasn't so much the problem. Her goal was to see her son more. This was led by this thought and feeling that with him going to kindergarten next year, she won't have as much time with him. So I asked her directly, "Okay, what does more time with your kid mean?" And she said, "I'd like to go on bike trips. I'd like to do more fun things throughout the week." I asked her to make a list of the things she wanted to do with her son.
And actually, through this process, she realized that although she wanted to spend more time with her kid, she didn't want to be home 100% of the time with him. She knew that this would not be great for the relationship. She also needed her own space. But when she made the list, honestly, it wasn't all that extensive. So I asked, "How could you easily do these things and stay at your job? How could you have your cake and eat it too?"
Then she told me that her job actually has unlimited PTO, but she doesn't take as much because then her boss would have to cover for her, and she'd feel guilty about that. And I absolutely loved learning this piece about her and her company. I work with so many people and have experienced the luxury but also the mental drama around PTO. In this case, she didn't want to take PTO because she didn't want her boss to cover for her, but instead, she wanted to leave her job entirely, which would actually mean, guess what? That her boss would be covering for her even more. So what she felt guilty about with the PTO, it's interesting that it wasn't a part of the conversation for actually leaving the company.
But this was also an opportunity to talk about an option that she hadn't thought about. Can you take more PTO and build in intentional time with your kids or your family that energizes you and lights you up? I'd ask that for all listeners who are in a corporate role and who are feeling drained. Is it possible for you to take more time off? I told her, "Before leaving your job, let's experiment with actually taking the PTO you are given and work on not feeling guilty." I know there's a lot of unspoken rules around unlimited PTO. I lived it. But listen, if you were already on your way of voluntarily saying goodbye, the worst thing that could happen is that your company fires you for taking too much of the unlimited PTO that they said you could have.
So she mapped out using PTO not just those bike trips that we talked about, but also for time during the week for herself and her family. I used to love taking off a random Wednesday in the week that was just for me. It was a beautiful midweek day where nothing's busy, and then I could catch up on emails the next day, which always felt like I could still go into the weekend without a lot of weight on my shoulders.
For her, another really exciting thing that popped up from this conversation is that her company has summer Fridays, where little work is expected on Friday. I don't know if it's official or unofficial, but she could essentially take those days off. So we talked through her spending one Friday each month on a little day date with her partner, one Friday each month as a personal day for herself, and two Fridays each month doing something fun with her kid. These options had her lit up and excited.
We're of course going to see how it all unfolds and listen, I wouldn't be surprised if she still ended up leaving her job. But here is a plan that allows us to see if there's a way for her to have the best of both worlds: a corporate role she feels proud of and more time with her kiddo.
Another thing that we explored, and that I've explored with plenty of moms, is the possibility of cutting hours. Yes, this usually cuts pay, but it's an option in the middle, right? Outside of the two extremes. Is there a specific schedule or hours that can shift that feels like a happy medium? Maybe dropping from 40 hours to 30, and that would give you Fridays to yourself or 10 hours a week to work on your business.
I just met a mom friend in my neighborhood who dropped down to 30 hours after her first son was born and just kept that schedule, and even now has Fridays off and that's her day to herself, which I just love. Maybe you want to work three days a week and you figure out what that looks like. Maybe you're in a role where you can completely work in the evenings, so it allows you to get to pick up on time, to do drop off, the kids don't have to go to extended care after school. Whatever the schedule, it may not be out of the realm of possibility. We'll never know if we don't explore it and if we don't ask.
I have another neighbor mom friend who recently returned to work after maternity leave, and it's been a struggle for her, as we all can attest to, that struggle. She's also been a bit frustrated with things that did and didn't happen while she was gone, so she's feeling like she came back to a bit of a mess. And on top of that, her husband's paternity leave is better than her company's maternity leave. His allows parents to ease back into work starting with a part-time schedule if they'd like.
And this glimpse into the possibility at another company gave her courage to test it out with her own. So she decided to start ending her day early and going home for the last hour of her workday. Now, this may not sound revolutionary and it's not, but to her, it was incredibly bold. And when she told her boss what she was doing, he completely supported it.
So many of the things that would give us energy about our schedules and about our work feel bold to us, but it might not be as bold as you think. She could tell that her company was just so happy to have her back and really didn't want her to leave her company. So she's learned that she actually can even ask for more. It sort of dawned on her as an aha moment. I could just ask for this. And then that's my question for this and for every mom, which is what else are we not asking for that could help us feel better at work?
Time and time again, I talk to and coach moms and see an underlying theme of not asking for what we need in the workplace. I would also go as far as to say we're not asking for what we need in our partnerships. And oftentimes, I think we know the answer from our partner will be a yes. But with our organizations, yes, some organizations just suck and some bosses just suck. But also in so many situations and scenarios, we aren't asking. We're just assuming the answer will be no.
We aren't even really asking ourselves what success looks like or what would make our work feel better. We're just jumping to the conclusion that since this doesn't feel good right now, the grass is greener on the other side. And all of these schedule requests that we could explore, since we don't see anyone else doing the thing we want to do, we usually don't ask. The thing that would help us ease back into work or keep us from feeling like we need to leave all together.
I don't care if the request is completely absurd. I want you to just ask. I had a coach one time who talked about asking for absurd things. Like this is just the way she lived her life. She asked for absurd things because she wanted to get really good at hearing no. And I just love that. Practicing hearing no in the real world, getting just really good at hearing no and asking for absurd things.
I want you to have a hard conversation with your employer, with your partner, where you're asking for what you need so that maybe you don't have to leave, or you don't have to leave just yet. Because I said before, though this podcast is called How to Quit Your Job, I'm never rushing clients out of their job. In fact, I'm usually finding ways that they could stay longer so that they have financial stability while they build. That's the best way to build a business from financial abundance.
The goal here is not necessarily to make ourselves stay in an environment where we're miserable long term. Our goal is to change our environment to make it more enjoyable by asking for a different schedule, taking more time off, dropping hours, asking to be on a different team with a different boss or in a different role altogether. Try out some of these options first so that you start a business while maintaining financial security.
That's the other thing I want to mention here. I'm definitely not suggesting that any one change is going to completely change everything. Even changing teams, bosses, hours, taking more time off, all combined, likely will not scratch the itch for you if you've been wanting to build something of your own or want true freedom in your time and days. That's okay. This isn't a forever fix. This is just literally buying you time while you are getting your business off the ground. But even while you're doing that, we want to feel better. So ask. Think of the best-case scenarios at work and ask for it. The worst that can happen is that they say no.
And ultimately, that's what I want you to take away from today's conversation. When we're stuck in all-or-nothing thinking, we miss opportunities that are right in front of us. The client I talked about earlier, after we had this conversation, she was, "Jenna, you're so smart." And I said, "No, I just don't have as much mental drama as you on this particular topic." We convince ourselves that our only options are to stay miserable or make a massive leap into uncertainty. But most of the time, all of the time, there are tons of possibilities in between.
So whether it's taking more PTO, reducing your hours, asking for a different schedule, changing teams, I want you to explore starting your business while keeping the paycheck and benefits that help your family feel secure. The goal isn't to stay somewhere forever that's no longer aligned. The goal is to make decisions from a place of clarity instead of desperation. And all-or-nothing thinking can put us into a space of desperation.
If this is something that you're navigating, I definitely want you to come to my free upcoming training where we'll go even deeper into this conversation. It's called How to Start a Business Without Financial Risk. If you're catching this live, that is on June 26th. So definitely be there. If you are not catching this live, what you need to do is go and subscribe or follow the podcast. That way, whenever new trainings and webinars and free resources come out, you will be one of the first to know about them because I'm always talking about them on the podcast.
In that training, we're going to talk about how to keep your job. We're going to talk about how to add a business into an already full life of a nine-to-five. We're going to talk about how to create a plan that feels exciting without putting unnecessary pressure on you or your family. We're going to talk about a lot of really fun things. So I hope you're catching this live, and if you're not, and if you missed it, please follow the podcast so you don't miss the next one. I try and do a training or webinar at least every month so that people can come in and learn from me, ask questions, get individualized support. It's been super fun.
You can learn more about what's going on and links to upcoming trainings and webinars at jenna.coach/109. You can also sign up for the Mom Entrepreneur’s Circle that I host and sign up for my email list so you never miss an episode and never miss any great resource that's coming out. Lots of ways for you to be supported, lots of ways for you to keep moving forward. And remember, there are more than just those two options.
Thank you so much for being here, supporting yourself through the podcast. I love being a voice in your ear to cheer you on and hope that you keep going. I'll see you next week.
Thanks for listening to this week’s episode of How to Quit Your Job: A Mom’s Guide to Creating a Life and Business You Love. If you want to learn more about how I can help you stop making excuses and start making moves, head on over to www.jenna.coach. I’ll see you next week.
Enjoy the Show?
Don’t miss an episode, follow the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or RSS.
